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the mental load of motherhood
mama, I want to tell you something honestly and gently:
Mothers are drowning under expectations, emotional labour and exhaustion and the world has no idea how heavy it truly is.
Not how it feels at 3am.
Not the way your mind runs like 47 open tabs.
Not the pressure to hold the joy, the plans, the emotions, and the magic together on broken sleep.
Motherhood is wrapped in “shoulds”:
You should enjoy it.
You should make it magical.
You should say yes.
You should keep the peace.
You should be grateful.
You should look like you’re coping.
But mama… you were never meant to carry this much.
December turns an already heavy load into something almost impossible to hold.
Behind every sparkling Christmas photo is a mother quietly running the entire operation.
Behind every gift is a mental checklist only she knows.
Behind every gathering is a mama managing naps, feeds, overstimulation and emotional fallout.
Behind every “Merry Christmas!” is a woman doing 95% of the invisible work.
And still somehow mothers are the first to be judged when they’re tired or overwhelmed.
So I’m writing this because I see you and someone needs to name this:
What you’re carrying is enormous.
And the world has no idea how heavy it truly is.
breaking the silence
Every December, the holiday mental load intensifies the emotional load of motherhood in ways most people never see. As a NICU nurse, IBCLC, and mother, I see the cracks forming long before mums say, “I’m not coping.”
December magnifies everything:
- the pressure
- the overstimulation
- the expectations
- the guilt
- the comparison
- the fear of disappointing others
- the emotional labour of “making it special”
The mental load doesn’t just increase – it multiplies.
These expectations leave many overwhelmed mothers feeling like they’re failing at the exact moment they’re trying their hardest.
Yet we still rarely talk about it.
We don’t name it.
We don’t acknowledge that mothers are the emotional backbone of this season — and they are buckling under the weight.
This is why I’m dedicating December and January to the real, messy, unfiltered truths of motherhood.
Because you deserve support.
You deserve honesty.
You deserve gentleness.
You deserve to be seen, especially now.
why I created the FREE holiday survival guide
Not to give you more to do.
Not to make you feel like there’s a “right way.”
Not to add pressure.
Not to pretend a guide can fix everything.
But to take some weight off your shoulders.
Every mama I know describes the mental load of motherhood as overwhelming and December makes it heavier. So I created this guide to ease the holiday mental load and give you a realistic, compassionate way to get through the season without burning out.
Inside, you’ll find tools to help you:
✨ simplify the chaos
✨ protect your peace
✨ set boundaries without guilt
✨ make feeding + naps easier on the go
✨ support your nervous system
✨ feel prepared without expecting perfection
You deserve ease.
You deserve joy.
You deserve a Christmas that honours your capacity, not everyone else’s demands.
This guide is my gift to you… a simple, compassionate support system for a season that overwhelms so many new mamas.
support for the mental load no one sees
If motherhood had a soundtrack in December, it would be a quiet loop of self-criticism:
“Am I doing enough?”
“Why can’t I cope?”
“Why does everyone else look okay?”
“Why do I feel so alone?”
This is the emotional and invisible load mothers carry only intensified during the holidays.
That’s why I’ll be sharing weekly affirmations.
Not cute quotes.
Not fluffy pep-talks.
But grounding reminders to bring you back to yourself.
Because motherhood at Christmas can chip away at your identity:
- You stop recognising yourself.
- You forget your strength.
- You question your body.
- You minimise your needs.
- You shrink your boundaries.
- You disappear behind the role of “mother.”
These affirmations are your anchors:
You are enough.
You are powerful.
Your softness is not failure.
Your boundaries are allowed.
Your needs matter.
And every week, I’ll give you a new set to steady you, lift you, and remind you who you are beneath the overwhelm.
Be sure to keep an eye out on my instagram and/or facebook for your weekly drop! 💖
mothers are breaking in silence
Motherhood has become a silent struggle. Mums are exhausted in ways society still refuses to acknowledge, yet still expected to smile through the pressure, the holiday photos, and the unrealistic demands placed on them. Someone needs to say the things mothers whisper in private but are too scared to speak out loud — and if no one else will stand up for them, I will. This season, ‘for mama, with love’ is my reminder to every woman that she is seen, she is worthy, she is allowed to rest, and she does not have to carry this alone
from my heart to yours
mama… you are doing the hardest job in the world during the hardest season of the year.
You are not failing – you are carrying too much.
You are not weak – you are exhausted.
You are not alone – you are part of a mamaunity that understands you deeply.
This month and next, I’ll be walking beside you.
With honesty.
With compassion.
With expertise.
With lived experience.
With zero judgement.
Because the mental load of motherhood is not yours to carry alone — not in December, not ever.
I got you, mama.
Always.
— Courts 💖
download your free “ultimate holiday survival guide for new mamas” and let it take some of the weight off your shoulders
Maternal mental health matters and your wellbeing is just as important as your baby’s. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, not yourself, or like things are getting too heavy to carry alone, please reach out for support. You deserve proper care, compassion, and someone to hold you through this season too.
mamalinc is here to support you emotionally and practically – but if you are ever feeling at risk, unsafe, or needing immediate help, please contact one of the services below. You do not have to wait. You are not alone. Help is available right now.
Trusted Australian perinatal and mental health supports:
PANDA (Perinatal Anxiety & Depression Australia)
COPE (Centre of Perinatal Excellence)
